Since 2020, I had tried on a number of spiritual outlets on for size. I suffered from a painful type of impostor syndrome that made it hard for me to sit with things for long enough to let deeper understanding dawn on me. But see, to enjoy tea you need to let the tea leaves steep. And then not only do you have yourself a nice beverage, but you can also appreciate that it is medicine.

I was too impatient to let the medicine do its thing.

For a time, I simply collected decks but was unable to enjoy them. I wonder if a part of me was resisting depth. Because depth rejects frivolity. When you’re in the deep, it’s hard for you to wade away at the first brush of distraction. It’s hard for you to look over your shoulder and experience FOMO. Because you’re busy developing familiarity with your instincts.

Most of us reject who we are, what our blueprint is… in favour of acceptance. This is not a bad strategy but one day you might wake up with a crushing weight on your chest, asking yourself why your life looks good on the outside but internally, you continue to suffer.

Even as a spiritual seeker, you might bypass in small ways. But your commitment to knowing yourself will triumph over the parts of you that are too cowardly. For instance, after collecting decks as a form of avoidance, I stopped purchasing decks for a year or two. Went cold turkey. And now when I collect, I know I’m doing it from a sincere place.

This is where the inner child comes in. 4 paragraphs into this blog, which if you’re still reading, kudos to you! The inner child can sit with a spiritual tool, reject the external stiffness and pretence that comes along with it. The Inner Child gets to the heart of the magic, meanwhile the adult mind is still tripping itself up on rationalising the facts. Why bother? Why not just suspend disbelief and walk with the innocence of a child? Not into the traps of others, but into your own self-discovery.

The Inner Child is the part of us that whole-heartedly dives into imagination. The golden child that is still connected to the thing we refer to as God. It was never disconnected from it. When the Inner Child connects with a healing modality, it helps you achieve a certain flow state with it. To banish thoughts of self-consciousness. A generation of ultra-recorded, ultra-monitored individuals can be certain of one thing — we always feel watched and berated. This is stopping us from developing intimacy. With art forms, with tarot decks, with books, you name it!

What’s the point of life if you’re going to spend it wondering what the RIGHT response to a situation is? Who cares about the right response when you can have your authentic response?

Over time, you realise that few things are as valuable as knowing what you truly want. And this alone can save you heartache. We always think about our responses and what they mean to others. But think back to the cute frankness of a child. It’s not meaning to offend anyone. It simply expresses itself. Yes, others can have exaggerated responses to our preferences, but that doesn’t eliminate our need to know ourselves.

With the wisdom of the Inner Child behind me, I’m able to bring a lot more focus, flow and dare I say… magic… back into my practices. In a way that has nothing to do with impressing others. It’s just how I live my life now.